The Ocean

I've always been very observant of what was going on around me. This characteristic is handy when trying to get to know new people or when making witty comments among your friends, but it also has made me who I am today. I've spent the first 21 years of my life trying to be the person I thought everyone wanted me to be. I made sure to say the right things, have the right friends, and obviously look the right way. Now I look around me and am just overwhelmed with a sense of remorse. I wasted so much time, so many relationships I left behind because I was more concerned with spending time making sure *I* thought people liked me than spending time making sure I was there for those people. Now I look ahead to May 2018 and wonder, once I walk out of Cornerstone University, who will I know? What relationships will last beyond the convenience of accessibility afforded by life in a college dorm? 

Over the past two weeks I've felt a heavy burden to discover more in my life. More understanding. More depth. More meaning. Only through Christ Jesus can I ever find the relationship that I so passionately crave, only in Him can I find the purpose for my life, with Him I can be who I was created to be. Until I lay down my own will I cannot, and will not, be able to have a meaningful relationship with other people because the focus is on me and my needs. I need to let go of myself and become fully devoted to the one who created me and put me here to accomplish His plan.

The lyrics to this song aren't written for this, the artist probably isn't even a Christian and that's ok. But tonight this is my prayer. The only place to truly find purpose is in Christ's arms, and from this day on I will spend my days striving to dwell constantly in His presence, regardless of the challenges this world brings:

You can be my safety zone
Somewhere
I can go and feel unknown
That's all I need
All I want
Is to stay a little longer now
Arms around me like a border
Like an endless stream
You take me in
To a place that I've never been
Now I'm
Giving in to your touch
I will never get enough
Dive in deep into the ocean
The Ocean - Mike Perry

I'm back... for now.

WOW! Its been over a year since I posted anything! I guess that's what happens when you get a phone and hardly ever use a computer. If anyone still follows blogs, I may try to start posting on here again...

What I learned from my mission trip

Wow, cool place, amazing people. This was a fun trip, got to fly, meet friends, and help out! This was more than just a vacation, more than just a work trip, this trip helped to change these kids lives! As a high-school student there are many questions, and not a lot of answers. What am I going to do for a living? Am I going to college? If I go to college, what will I get a degree in? Even questions like, What do I like to do? What do I WANT to do? Its hard to find answers for these and all the many other questions. On this trip, I felt usefull, I was working, but it didn't feel like a chore. This was a chance to help these people who give almost everything in their lives, to help these kids, I had a chance to have a good attitude, and to enjoy the time I spent with other people. Now my mom has often told me I was good with kids, and that I had a compassionate heart. I had always sort of doubted it, most of the kids I know, I've known all their lives. So why wouldn't they like me? And besides, who isn't nice to the SUPER cute and adorable 3 month old? So I didn't pay much attention to her saying that. But when I saw these kids, who have GREAT joy... even though they have a disability, they don't care, their desire to learn and find out more and their friendliness. It touched me. I could spend my life helping kids like them. If not for the ranch, these kids would be outcasts, shunned by society, unable to better themselves. Yet here I am. With all the gifts, and talents God's blessed me with, and many different opportunities I could take advantage of. But I've complained about those very things! This trip gave me the perspective I was lacking. Now I am looking at school as a blessing to be taken advantage of. Of my loving family as something special, that not everyone gets.

This trip has opened my eyes, to be able to look at ALL of the blessings I have now, and helped me to thank God for them. I hope you can look at your lives and appreciate all God has given you.

Gabe Quakkelaar

September 8th, 2012

Everything went well today, got through the border easlily, and the flights were on time or early. So the only downer is that Mizzou  and the Cardinals lost.

I have to write a paper about the trip. BLEH! =P
I'll be doing it though... and hopefully we will be going up to the church in St. Louis this sunday! For the slideshow during church.

HOME SWEET HOME!!!

September 7th, 2012

We are leaving tomorrow morning at 6 A.M. ='( This was an amazing trip. Meeting the people in our group, the RSM staff, and all the kids. It made me feel something. It made me excited to work, to help out others, to use my life for something.

We started our day well, got up at 5 A.M. and hiked up the hill/mountain with Reuben and Christopher, and Ken, Glen, Dad, and Jeremiah. We watched the sunrise. Awesome :)

 

 Then Christopher showed us a cave he had found. To get out... you had to spider-walk up a little crack between two big rocks, which involves putting your back against one wall and pushing yourself up with you feet and hands, using your legs to wedge yourself in, so you didn't fall. =) This was fun! ;) Then we hiked back down to breakfast, which was hot dogs & eggs, cereal, and Toast! yum =) Afterwords Ken volunteered us for backfilling a wall by the missionary training center... started us working, and left to go shopping?!?! :P So Glenn, Jeremiah, and I had to do it. It was HARD work. And it turned out that we had done MORE than they expected/wanted us to do! Finished, and then headed up to lunch, Spaghetti! Then we went swimming, and just hung out. Got PIZZA for dinner! :D The pizza was good, they go pretty light with the sauce and with the cheese, so... they could improve, but still not bad. Then had Ice Cream for dessert! The kids were SOOOO happy =) Then we played basketball, our group prayed together, and packed up. Now for sleep....

September 6th, 2012

I SLEPT IN!!! Played cards till breakfast, had cheese quesadillas & beans for breakfast. Went out to finish cleaning the shed. Had bbq chicken & an apple for lunch. Then put together an excercise machine, a really nasty puzzle! :p Then finalized our Bible study and relaxed for the rest of the day =) We played basketball with some of the kids! It was So cool! =) Our Bible study went well went very well, it wasn't as good as it could have been, but it was still good! =)

September 5th, 2012

Had a LOT of work today. We helped to finish framing the studs in the classroom, had hot dogs, french fries, and papaya for breakfast. Afterwords we (Jeremiah and I) ha dot mow. Let me describe this job to you... it's RIDICULOUS!!!  Their grass is long and thick! You'd think being in a desert it wouldn't be to bad of a chore... but that was the hardest job ALL week. So we worked long and hard on it, my arms and legs were killing me by the time we finished. The total area of grass, was only about a 1/4 of our yard... but it took FOREVER! We also had to weed-eat, and then blow all the grass of the sidewalks, which reminds me. There were trees, and sidewalks, and some other things we had to work around, which just made it harder :p But... we finished that around 2, maybe 2:30... and then we relaxed! Just kidding, then we carried about 30 sheets of drywall up to the classroom. -_- Finished those things, and then went and finished our Bible study. Praying it goes well! Lunch was tacos & rice, dinner was Ham & Cheese subs =)

September 4th, 2012

(Side note: It's VERY convenient to start you trip on the 1st of the month)

Scraped all the tiles next to the walls off the floor, then stayed inside the rest of the day, because Ken, Glen, and Dad were using some loud equipment. Befoe lunch we played some nerts, then had burritos for lunch. :) After lunch we played nerts some more, then made Kelli go do homework, and then me and Jeremiah worked on our Bible Study. Our topic is focusing on God, and using our gifts, time, and possesions for him. Instead of for ourselves. Reference: Luke 14:7-27

Dustin, Ken, Glen, and Dad got the frame up on 3 of the walls today, in the morning we also started cleaning out a toolshed/workshop area and tried to sort the stuff in it.

RSM Pics

For those of you who didn't know, Me, Eva, and Dad went to a deaf ranch in Mexico with a group from a church in St Louis. We helped do some framing, and some general tasks around the ranch, as the staff got ready for the school year.

 Sorry we didn't take more pictures, but here is a few.

It was a tropical/dessert climate

Cacti

Eva and Bethany

A SUPER nice house in the small town by the ranch

Jeremiah...

Eva, Bethany, and Sophia helping in the kitchen

Eva helping in the pantry

Bethany helping in the pantry

FOOSBALL!!! =)

A REALLY cool picture on the wall we tore down

Eva, Bethany, and Sophia with JJ

Kelli and JJ

Mrs L. and JJ

Our group

Serving PIZZA!!!

Moriah & JJ

All the kids!

The view from the plane

That beautiful picture again

The sunrise from the top of the hill

Coming over the horizon...

And its up!

Me and Jeremiah

Nerts!

Kelli's favorite game...

Kelli sitting in Luke's chair... thats a BIG no-no!

September 3rd, 2012

DON'T EAT TO COLD TUNA SALAD LUNCH DISH-THINGY!!! =P
We tore drywall off a ceiling and a wall. Moved and sorted two classrooms full of stuff, scraped my right thumb up really bad =/ I bruised under the fingernail and peeled off a bunch of skin. It was an oozing bloody mess, that hurt like crazy!

Taught Jeremiah how to play 'up and down the river' and then tought Kelli how to play Nerts. =)

For devotions dad told a story about an asian sunday school teacher, who taught his students about how if you have faitht the size of a mustard seed, you can move mountains. The kids decided to try it. It was hard for the teacher, he didn't want to say "it won't happen" because then why should they believe? So he waited and watched.  The next day, VERY unexpectedly, the government announced that they were going to bulldoze the WHOLE MOUNTAIN!!! We need to trust & have faith in God like a child.

Me and Jeremiah may be leading devotions on Thursday...